Archive for the ‘I haven’t eaten since Tuesday’ Category

To say that I’ve been ill the last three days does not even begin to describe it. This was simply by far this sickest I have ever been.  The only time that I can remember even coming close was in 2003 when I ate a Lamb kabob bought from a street vendor in Baghdad. Despite the fact that said Lamb kabob was delicious, during the two days that followed my digestive system revolted and decided to teach me a lesson. The only time I was able to stop vomiting was when I was tearing at my belt and trying not to shit my pants.

The past few days were far worse than that. Tuesday morning I felt fine, but by noon I had a killer headache. Somewhere around two in the afternoon my eyes started to hurt so bad they felt like they were going to melt out of their sockets and I could feel the chills setting in. So, for the first time in as long as I can remember I left work early and headed home to ride it out.

Usually, I can suck it up and still get things done but not this time. I spent the rest of Tuesday afternoon and all of Tuesday night in bed buried under three blankets shivering uncontrollably. The shivers got so bad I pulled a muscle in my back and couldn’t even stand up without looking like an eighty-year old man.

It got worse. I only remember pieces of Wednesday. I remember the room spinning like I was drunk and trying to pass out. I remember searching frantically for a thermometer to find out if I was just dreaming that I was on fire or if my fever was anywhere near as high as I thought it might be. I remember it being 104.56  and thinking that sounded pretty high. I remember my two dogs whining and crying and then at some point howling like wolves. I think I was delirious for a while and remember some crazy dreams which might not have been dreams but I’m not so sure. It’s too nuts to try to explain, but trust me they were in the realm of schitzo.  I really thought I was gonna check out for a while there and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I couldn’t even lift my arms or my head off the pillow never mind get out of bed. I remember thinking they’re going to find me here melted into the mattress in a couple of weeks.

I don’t remember calling my sister in Maine at 4 in the morning, but I did and left a goodbye voicemail.  She called back at 11 am on Thursday and gave me hell for leaving a drunk voicemail on her phone in the middle of the night. When I told her the situation she said,” Huh, really? ummm well, glad you’re not dead.” Ya, Sis. Me too.

The fever broke sometime Thursday morning and I spent the rest of the day sweating and drinking water and eating Advil like candy. My dogs were in a considerably better spirits but they were watching me pretty closely, like they weren’t so sure they weren’t going to have to find another meal ticket.

Today, I’m a little weak but I sort of feel like my usual self.  And I’m like ten pounds lighter, which pretty much makes the whole experience worth it.

Have a great weekend.